Welcome to the blog of Sir Dave where you can find news, appointment availability, new purchases, new ideas and just my thoughts on life work and the world. Oh and maybe the odd photo or collection of photo's I like.
I just wanted to say a few words as we wave goodbye to the shitshow that has been 2020! If you click the image to the right you can watch my Christmas Message video.
For many of us, it has been absolutely devastating for our businesses and the businesses we love.
I have found it really quite tough not being able to work. Not able to do the job I love for the majority if this year has been horrible and really quite hard mentally. It is one of the reasons I haven’t done many new videos or been online much, but it is essential we look after ourselves right now and get through this.
Now, as we move into 2021 if you can support small businesses, be those butchers, bakers, leather makers, sex workers, coffee shops, kink stores … or any small independent store, please do!
Now more then ever the phrase “Use them or lose them” is critically important!
This also relates to favourite artists and content creators – if they have a Patreon or OnlyFans then support them if you can. All too often porn is stolen and people don’t feel they should pay for it – making content doesn’t come free of time, effort or money. So even if just a couple of quid tip, show your appreciation … and remember, wanking is year-round … not just for Christmas so if you can’t afford to support them now but can in the spring then do it then. It helps us pay our bills and encourages us to do more of what you love to see.
I don’t want to come across preaching or “woe is me”, quite the opposite, my stepping back has helped me get through this period. And I’ve tried to help others where I can, but I will admit I have been quite poor at keeping in touch with people these past few months.
Christmas is a time of so much pressure and expectation on us, and it’s tough for so many people. And this year it is that times a hundred! We can’t see friends or family, and we can’t socialise as we usually would.
For a lot of us, that means we may be spending Christmas home alone. And I have been so pleased to see so many in the kink and fetish communities all over the world organise online social gatherings on Christmas day for those who are alone or who want to chat to others. If this is something you would benefit from reach out and find local groups doing this.
That has been the year that has gone, let us look forward to 2021!
I’ve set myself a few things to look forward to, some new leathers once I get back to work – jeans, shirt and Muir cap high on the shopping list and then I need to visit Enfettered to get something new for the dungeon too!
And yes I’ve got a bit Covid fat – one of the reasons for the new gear, but that just means there is more of me to enjoy! And when things calm down a bit and I have the right focus I hope to lose those extra few kilos. But ya know what, right now I’m not beating myself up about it.
Unfortunately, social media and a lot of porn can perpetuate the myth that everyone has to fit the “Love Island” look. That isn’t realistic and frankly not something I find attractive or sexy – give me chunk and jiggly bits any day!
If you do have worries about body image and confidence I have found that watching Naked Attraction on Channel 4 is a great reminder that advertisers are wrong. We do all love different shapes, sizes, ages and have different sexual interests and turn-ons!
Anyway, I only wanted to say hello and Merry Christmas but seem to have gone on a bit. If you are struggling and just want to talk to someone please call the Samaritans anytime on 116 123. They are there to listen and for you to talk, even if you just want to say Merry Christmas or hello to another human – it can really help and you shouldn’t feel in any way embarrassed to call. They exist to ensure everyone has someone to talk to.
So, thank you to all those whose company I have had the pleasure and honour of enjoying this year, and I hope we can get together and enjoy lots of fun times in 2021!
I’m very excited to be attending Brew Hunter’s Mastery at The Backstreet in London, the UK’s only strict dress-code Leather Bar. If you are attending would be great to say hello – but introduce yourself as I have a terrible memory and won’t recognise most people I follow.
I am also taking bookings for subs or slaves looking to serve in London.
If you have always wanted to experience a session with me now is the perfect opportunity! Book early to get the best times available, deposits will be required! Contact me via email or call / WhatsApp 07516 036 105.
This past Christmas I was passed a family recipe … homemade Baileys! I didn’t think it would work, but this stuff really does!! Being a Bourbon fan I have used some Makers Mark here in mine, the measures below do give quite a Bourbon flavour to it, so use Scotch or slightly less alcohol if preferred.
I also use Emlea Single here as that has a slightly better shelf life than regular cream, but that is a personal preference. Once mixed make sure you taste and adjust the mixture to your preference.
If you want to go real retro you can use Camp Coffee instead (reduce to 2tsp and taste).
Happy New Year, I hope 2020 is a great kinky one for you!
Put all the ingredients into a blender, blitz for 30seconds and then pour into sterilised container. Or gym shaker so when working out your “Protein Shake” gives you that bit of an extra kick!
With January now firmly upon us, many start to think about what they want to do in the new year. So this year lets all try to do something new to expand our interests.
This year I plan on doing some new bars, clubs and events, how about you, why not try somewhere new. That could just be a visit to a new city, a new cafe or new bar or even try a very different event.
There is now only one leather bar left in the UK – Backstreet. If you haven’t been then I cant recommend you go enough, it is an amazing friendly sexy and sleazy space! And best of all – they ban phones! If your in a leather bar you should cruise, talk, touch, taste and enjoy as you wish! You should do it in real life not on apps!
For my taste too many clubs now are just fuck clubs with a dress code, and for many events not very well enforced. I want somewhere to play, somewhere that has the space and furniture to put on a show! And so this year I will be visiting Kinky Consent in Dudley. A mixed club night that sounds fantastic fun! Look out for the write up in a few months time …
When we start out on our leather journey of discovery we don’t really know too much. And after a few years we know a little more, maybe we have found a particular interest – rope bondage, single tail whips, humiliation, ass play, objectification or animal role play.
But how do we learn? Most people just make things up and see how it goes, which for a lot of play is fine but for others very dangerous. For example using the wrong type of candles for wax play can lead to very serious burns.
When you start out do you know the importance of aftercare, of the come down for both the Dom and sub? How about knowing how clean some boots properly, look after your leathers or make your rubber super shiney?
Fortunately we usually find others to help us, play partners, Sirs, boys, pups or just friends. And then there is of course a wealth of knowledge in books and other publications that you can refer to and learn from. There are also some online learning resources like FetLife or Kink Academy we can use.
But nothing beats hands on personal coaching, someone showing you how to do something and to help you get better.
So in 2019 why not find someone to help coach you in an aspect of your play you aren’t that confident with. It could be flogging, rope bondage, asserting your dominance or finding your inner pup.
I’m looking forward to booking some private coaching myself this year. What about you?
2018 was a blast, but 2019 is going to be amazing!
Last year we waved goodbye to Tumblr, and this year most people are saying hello to BDSMLR the new home of kink, leather and bondage porn! But one of the best starts to the new year has been my Twitter thread where I asked what was the first TV programme or film that got you interested in kink. There have been some great responses including Darth Vader, Flash Gordon, Rugby games, Terminator to mention a few.
And a few references to one of my early favourite scenes – Bring Out the Gimp in Pulp Fiction. Heart pounding dick throbbing in the cinema!! Another was a film that was on TV, I don’t remember much about it and certainly not the name … but I do clearly remember a guy being handcuffed to a bed and tormented. And then going on the run from his everyday life with the handcuffs locked onto one wrist as a reminder he wasn’t a free man.
Those early memories that sometimes surprise you … a desire or even need to explore and do something you never expected! Going from thinking about it, wanking about the fantasy is something we have all done. But the thought of making that fantasy a reality is something very different and a whole lot more scary.
And that is what I love to do … to help your fantasy become a reality, something you can look back on and enjoy! I had a lovely elderly gentleman visit who told me that he wanted to be able to lie on his deathbed and think back on all the amazing experiences he had enjoyed. Even if he couldn’t share them with anyone, he could enjoy those amazing memories.
This year I will continue to build my dungeon collection, starting in the next few days with new seated suspension to complete my suspension offerings. I’m really looking forward to trying it out – will be perfect to use with the Venus milking machine!
If you are a big fan of really restrictive bondage how would a rubber vac-rac appeal? That is on the list to add in 2019.
I don’t just help start people on their Kink journeys, I also help people out with a Try Before You Buy idea. Do you want to spend over £1,000 on a milking machine never having experienced it … book in for an hour to find out how good it is first!
So whatever your interest, your fantasy, the scene that got you excited to explore perversions and kink I love to hear about them all. And if you would like to try something out then please get in touch!