Welcome to the blog of Sir Dave where you can find news, appointment availability, new purchases, new ideas and just my thoughts on life work and the world. Oh and maybe the odd photo or collection of photo's I like.


Counting With Sir

15th November 2022

You can view the video that goes with this post here.

One of the biggest thrills for many in BDSM sessions and play is power exchange – the differentiation of the Dom and sub, the Superior and the inferior, the Master and the boy. There are many ways we do this – a collar, a Leathered Sir and naked slave, the language we use – Sir, Master, boy, slut, whore, faggot etc.

I always enjoy exploring this in sessions with something simple. Very much going back to basics to help focus the sub’s mind. Counting. It really is very simple, but surprisingly difficult for many to remember the requirements and protocols.

This of course lends itself perfectly to impact play, counting how many spanks or strokes etc. But can be applied to many other things too – time being the other obvious example. Such as holding a position or enduring an activity for a given period.

So, how to count? One, two, three and so forth is how people count. But that doesn’t mean much – it doesn’t help remind the sub of their position. They need to add one word after each number. Doing this shows an understanding of their place and why they are counting.

That word is of course, Sir.

So now the simple task of counting how many times you are spanked / flogged / paddled / touched has much more meaning to it.

“One Sir! Two Sir! Three Sir! Four Sir! Five Sir! Six Sir!”

The emphasis of how they say it is important – it must show understanding of submission and respect for the Dom. If the sub has been instructed to count a given number, or when the activity being counted has finished, they must also show the utmost respect for their Dom.

“One Sir! Two Sir! Three Sir! Thank you Sir!”

So straight away a simple activity, such as hands tied behind your back, blindfolded and counting each time you feel the light tap of maybe a gloved hand somewhere on your body becomes much more intense, much deeper and much more connected to the idea of bondage, domination and submission.

It is far from being a “heavy” activity, just very simple and one I often use to start a session with someone who hasn’t had any or much BDSM experience. It helps build the trust, very much a deep dive into the scene – and all we have is a simple blindfold, a pair of padded leather cuffs clipped together, and counting to ten.

I know some people who have gone on to become very experienced BDSM players and do very heavy scenes and enjoy many other aspects of play. But they still say the most emotionally intense and memorable scene has been this first simplest one.

That one gave them confidence; gave them such a positive experience they were hungry to explore more. So never feel that you need to do anything to an “extreme” for it to be real / proper / hard play. The simplest of scenarios can be the most intense / hard / extreme scene.

So that is how I like to start a sub / slaves training, a very simple gentle scene and basic instruction. Counting to ten.

But this counting protocol is one I expect them to remember! It will be used many times. Mostly for counting, but sometimes as a time-based instruction. For example, it may be clamps on nipples, weights hanging off balls, or holding a stress position. So, for this scenario, I would expect a slow consistent counting, followed by the “Thankyou Sir” at the end of the counting when the activity will end.

Now of course some boys are a bit cheeky or bratty and count far too quickly, so in that case, an adjustment is required to the instruction, extra respect. So now a count could become:

“Sir, one Sir! Sir, two Sir! Sir, three Sir! Sir, four Sir! Sir, five Sir! Sir, six Sir! Sir, thank you Sir!”

So suddenly the count is slowed down, it also becomes a very simple tongue twister too. If you try to say it too fast, you will most likely make a mistake. Miscounting or forgetting a Sir in the count. And what if the boy does make a mistake? The task and count must be restarted until it is completed accurately and completed properly!

Or perhaps it needs to be expanded further to teach them a lesson because the endurance will be much longer this time.

“Sir, one Sir! Thank you Sir! Sir, two Sir! Thank you Sir! Sir, three Sir! Thank you Sir!”

Now of course, because we are kinky perverts there are always ways of adding extra layers to the play and what we do.

So far, we have trained the boy to show appreciation for what is being done, but they don’t just need to appreciate it, to enjoy it. They need to want it, desire it, to crave it. And we can help train them to do that with three little words.

If we use a flogging scene, the boy has been told he will count out four strokes with a flogger. Nothing too heavy, just a warmup, and to see how this particular flogger feels for them. Before the flogging begins, I need to confirm they are ready for me to start. Are they in a comfortable position, and are they mentally focused and prepared? A simple question – “Ready boy?” But how should they respond? A perfect one I think is

“Hit me Sir!”

Three little words. And they achieve so much for us. First of all, they give confirmation they have understood what is expected of them and that they are ready to begin. It is also helping them understand and deepen their submission by asking to be hit by Sir. And that is also reinforcing that consent has been sought and given for the activity.

A small variation of this for those who wish to communicate they are happy to go harder / further. Or for those who we both know are pain pigs and crave it. When asked if the boy is ready, a response that is always exciting can be either of the following (the second works when we have done the scenario a few times)

“Hurt me Sir!” or “Harder Sir!”

And there where we have it, how the simplest of activities can add such a strong and deep meaning to our play and exploration.

Hopefully, something to think about to add to your own scenes. Or if you want to try out some kinky play for the first time why not book in for an hour and I can teach you how to count.

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Time for a Spanking

19th July 2022

Spanking … something many naughty boys desire, lust after or require.

And it’s something I find so much fun to do! I recently had the pleasure of the visit of a very naughty boy whose bum needed a lot of attention! An hour and half of spanking in fact.

You can see it here halfway through the session, doesn’t it look amazing and warm! Red bottoms are always such a treat to look at. I started him off with some classic over-the-knee spanking through his shorts to get warmed up.

This time also allows me to do something else – have a good feel! Spanking isn’t just hitting someone’s arse – that gets very boring for both parties, there is a skill and an art to it. The area you have to work with is a lot bigger than your hand, and you need to get familiar with it.

So while someone is over your knee you can do some nice gentle slaps, but you can also have a good exploration and get to know what you are working with.

Let them feel your hand running over the ass, down the crack, a gentle touch of the tips of your fingers behind their balls, finding the line between ass and legs and of course a nice big circle to run around the outside of the area you have to work with.

Now as I get familiar I can throw in some good sharp smacks here and there with a nice rub to soothe the buttocks afterwards. The reward if you like. And this can continue for a while, then it’s time for the shorts to come off! It’s so erotic and sexy to see an ass in front of you bent over, asking to be spanked. Craving that warmth and the feeling of the red glow.

The 2nd position often use is with the subject on their feet bent over … but this is a hard position to hold, so I usually put a small stool down for them to rest their hands and upper body weight on. This also allows for spanking to be included into other forms of play, maybe a quick punishment to remind them of their behaviour or that they aren’t showing Sir enough respect. They can be moved to lean over and rest on the stool knowing what is coming.

Since this was a longer session where spanking and impact play was a big part of it there was one place the boy needed to be, on the whipping bench or rather spanking bench for this session. This beautiful piece of furniture is from Fetters Warwick, padded leather support for both body and legs with straps to hold them down … up to 12 of them infact! But I mostly use the rear ones to hold down the legs and body.

And so it begins, the ass as in the perfect position and height for a thrashing!

Now spanking of course affects both of us, the sting of the spank also affects my hand! So to help with this I usually wear my tight leather gloves, they lessen the sing to my hand and look fucking hot. But sometimes even with the gloves, my hands need a little break so have an extensive range of paddles to use.

The paddles also add a different sensation and experience for the bottom, some softer, some worse, some much much worse.

But enough talk, would you like to see a video of the spanking? You should Follow me on Twitter or keep an eye out and you can see a preview in a few day’s time!

Finally – remember spanking or impact play isn’t for everyone! And of course, sometimes marks and bruises need to be avoided which I can do. Just let me know beforehand!

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Rubber, boots, suspension & miking

12th July 2022

This is a picture from slaves visit a few months back, a very memorable and enjoyable time!

A long time ago I saw a picture of another sub/slave in a similar position and always enjoyed the look of it, so when the opportunity came to recreate it I couldn’t say no.

A combination of rubber, tit pegs, suspension and milking with the Venus milker. Perfect! Of course the trick is to keep them on edge as long as possible … not always easily achieved with the milker though.

I didn’t this time but you could add to the intensity of this with say an eStim or vibrating butt plug.

Here I am using a sit suspension harness – easier to set up than the full suspension harness, and a more comfortable seated position for the legs. You just have to get the back support right which can be tricky to get right. But for scenes like this, it is a perfect solution.

Have you seen a photo or video online you find so hot you want to try to recreate it? Why not share it with me and we can see if we can make it happen for you!

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New Dungeon for London Sessions

12th March 2019

This week I visited an amazing new Dungeon that is perfect for those in London and surrounding areas looking to book a BDSM Dungeon session with myself.

This is a private dungeon available for sessions, and is incredibly well equipped! How well? Well to give you an idea it as all the following items:

  • Fetters Bondage Wheel
  • Fetters Inversion Table
  • Fetters Bondage Chair
  • Fetters Bondage Table
  • Fetters Sling
  • Fetters Tall Cage
  • Fetters Sleepsack with Shoulder Suspension
  • Tall suspension frame with three electric hoists

And of course a huge collection of bondage cuffs, leather and rubber hoods, gas masks etc. And a very extensive collection of whips, floggers and paddles all by Essentia whips.

[foogallery id=”707″]

I also love the padded isolation cage in the corner too – complete with straps inside to make sure you are save and secure for an intense bondage experience!

With all this amazing kit available, including a Venus milker or even a SeriousKit Milking Machine (by special arrangement) you are guaranteed of an intense and unique experience with so much kit t0 choose from.

So instead of fantasising about it, get in touch and book your session!

Sessions are available here with booking, check out the rates page for details!

The dungeon is just 35minutes from Euston if your in London, which is a lot more convenient then spending an hour travelling across the city.

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Welcome to 2019 … The Year of Kink

3rd January 2019

2018 was a blast, but 2019 is going to be amazing!

Last year we waved goodbye to Tumblr, and this year most people are saying hello to BDSMLR the new home of kink, leather and bondage porn! But one of the best starts to the new year has been my Twitter thread where I asked what was the first TV programme or film that got you interested in kink. There have been some great responses including Darth Vader, Flash Gordon, Rugby games, Terminator to mention a few.

And a few references to one of my early favourite scenes – Bring Out the Gimp in Pulp Fiction. Heart pounding dick throbbing in the cinema!! Another was a film that was on TV, I don’t remember much about it and certainly not the name … but I do clearly remember a guy being handcuffed to a bed and tormented. And then going on the run from his everyday life with the handcuffs locked onto one wrist as a reminder he wasn’t a free man.

Those early memories that sometimes surprise you … a desire or even need to explore and do something you never expected! Going from thinking about it, wanking about the fantasy is something we have all done. But the thought of making that fantasy a reality is something very different and a whole lot more scary.

And that is what I love to do … to help your fantasy become a reality, something you can look back on and enjoy! I had a lovely elderly gentleman visit who told me that he wanted to be able to lie on his deathbed and think back on all the amazing experiences he had enjoyed. Even if he couldn’t share them with anyone, he could enjoy those amazing memories.

This year I will continue to build my dungeon collection, starting in the next few days with new seated suspension to complete my suspension offerings. I’m really looking forward to trying it out – will be perfect to use with the Venus milking machine!

If you are a big fan of really restrictive bondage how would a rubber vac-rac appeal? That is on the list to add in 2019.

I don’t just help start people on their Kink journeys, I also help people out with a Try Before You Buy idea. Do you want to spend over £1,000 on a milking machine never having experienced it … book in for an hour to find out how good it is first!

So whatever your interest, your fantasy, the scene that got you excited to explore perversions and kink I love to hear about them all. And if you would like to try something out then please get in touch!

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