Welcome to the blog of Sir Dave where you can find news, appointment availability, new purchases, new ideas and just my thoughts on life work and the world. Oh and maybe the odd photo or collection of photo's I like.
The past few months have been amongst the hardest for me these past two Covid years.
Once Covid had its grubby little paws into the world the world stopped. It had to. And with that work for me stopped. It had to.
That was tough, but there was a focus to it that helped me to get through and to look forward to.
And then post-restrictions I was able to get back to what I love doing, helping people explore their kinks, fetishes, fantasies, and sexual desires. It was so good to be back in gear, back in the dungeon and enjoying ourselves again.
I have spoken before about how much I love my job, it really is amazing! Some people I talk to think that it is easy, it really isn’t. It is a business, and that comes with a whole host of extra work – it is so much more than just the sessions. Promotion, marketing, personal development and wellbeing, more promotion and marketing and then more promotion, then a bit more too.
And this has been the problem these past few months – it feels like it is all promotion and not enough time in sessions.
I’ve talked with some friends who also work as escorts, and they have said the same thing. A lot of people aren’t ready to come back to see us yet.
I’m not one of those people who always have to say how busy they are, how booked up they are, how they are a top % of some content website or other, listing how many followers they have in their Twitter profile. I do what I do because I love it, because I am good at it and most of all because my clients love what I do and think I am good at it.
But it feels like of late my focus has been on marketing and promotion, what do I need to tweet, what do I need to say, what do I need to write or film. Updating and rewriting listings. And it is hard! I’ve not had any motivation to make new videos for a few months.
I love this job and I don’t want to get to a point where I resent any part of what it involves, so I’ve decided to finish early for Christmas and take a short break. We have a new Omicron variant of Covid that we are still waiting for data to see how that affects the world, and of course, that is putting people off sessions again or making them wary.
And this constant push to get bookings but them not coming has been tough to deal with mentally, it has had a detrimental effect on the customer experience. I’ve been slower and responding to emails, to messages, forgetting to check them etc. And that is awful … that is when I realised I need to rest. I need to take some time to re-energise, to get the excitement back, the focus that is needed to give not 80, 90, 95 or 99% to the experience but a full 100%!
So I have decided that I will start a break for the Christmas period and January (always a tough time as it’s a depressingly long month and no one has any money). I’m still gonna be here, I’m still going to check emails and my phone. I need to break some of the bad habits that are creeping in. So if you want a session in January that would be amazing and you will be very welcome, but I’m not going to be promoting or pushing for them.
I will still be on Twitter, I will still be tweeting and chatting to people but maybe not as much. I will be trying to get the focus on checking my phone more regularly again, but at the moment one of the best ways of getting in touch is to send an email to [email protected].
Other listing sites I’m not going to update as regularly. I’m going to delay the redesign of my website and use that to rebuild my focus.
It’s been a horrendous time, but we will all get through this, I have my booster jab this week and will still be around.
So let’s all get our jabs, do our tests, wear our masks, help to keep everyone safe so we can make 2022 one hell of a kinky year with lots of fun!
So for now, have a Merry Kinkmas, thank you for your custom and support this past year and I look forward to our adventures together in 2022.
I am so pleased to be able to have sessions again regularly after the past 18 months of Covid. It’s is quite strange it feels like we skipped a year – we just miss 2020 when talking about seeing people, going on holiday or to events.
But restrictions are easing and the UK in the coming weeks should hit 90% of the adult population double jabbed which is an amazing achievement! Particularly when you consider less than a year ago we didn’t have a single vaccine to fight this global pandemic!
We do still need to be very aware of Covid, it is not going to go away – the world has only irradicated one disease in our history (apart from about two or three labs where it is kept just in case). So we will need to live with it, and hopefully, we can all get through the winter without any major disruptions.
And part of that living with it now is regular testing – the best prevention is to know your status. That sounds like a familiar phrase from the 80’s and 90’s. And like then it is true, if you know you are Covid positive you can isolate and prevent infection and spreading to others.
And as part of that, I am now taking almost daily Lateral Flow tests. Every day I have a client session booked I take a test first thing in the morning to make sure I am not putting them at risk. I understand these tests are as accurate as a PCR one, but they are simple, easy and give immediate results. If I think I have been exposed I book a PCR and wait for the result (fortunately that has only happened twice and both times negative).
The tests that you can order on the Gov.UK website are now nasal swabs only, which is so much easier to go and requires a lot less gagging.
Over the recent weeks, I have received several messages and calls from people asking if I would be happy seeing them because they don’t feel they have the right look, body shape or size. Or that their fantasy is too “odd” or “unusual”.
I’m Sir Dave and like to think of myself as a Professional Kink and Fetish Enabler. For me a really important part of what I do is making sure everyone feels welcome, everyone feels sexy, and everyone gets to enjoy their kink, fantasy or fetish.
Whatever it is.
No judgement, no criticism, no “oh my god really?!” Just a space to indulge your interests and enjoy some fun together.
So I wanted to touch on a few specifics to help you feel comfortable in opening a conversation with me. First of all, let’s talk about bodies. I have said before many times I have no hang-ups about people’s bodies shapes or sizes. Porn and social media generally show the stereotype of a good looking body.
And if we don’t fit into that mould we can be made to feel we aren’t desirable or that we aren’t welcome in the club so to speak. Well, I am here to say you are most definitely welcome in the club!
One question I get is about age … and I can assure you that you are never too old. One of my oldest clients was disappointed he couldn’t come for a spanking on his birthday to celebrate his 80th! But he did get a good 80 whacks a few days later!
I do have one age limit though – you must be over 18 to come for a session. If I don’t think you are, or you look like an incredibly young thirty-year old I may ask for ID. Please don’t get offended – I am just ensuring everyone is safe, and that I am completely happy we are both consenting adults.
So age isn’t an issue, what about body sizes. This is probably the biggest barrier for so many, body confidence. Too thin, too fat, don’t have muscles, don’t have a six-pack, don’t have the right amount of body hair – too smooth, too hairy.
I don’t have a six-pack and I have a belly. But I quite like one. I also like cake and red wine – so it is fortunate I enjoy a bit of fat!
Some people are bigger, they look at a biscuit and feel like they gain half a kilo! But sometimes people are really thin, and their body type and metabolism mean they can’t ‘bulk up’ … they don’t gain weight or muscle no matter how much they want to.
We all have different bodies, and they are all amazing and sexy to me! I have had clients who are too thin for some of my restraints on the smallest hole, I’ve had clients that my arms won’t reach around when I give them a hug.
You have a body, and I am not going to judge you by it, I’m just going to make you feel sexy and enjoy discovering your erogenous zones and how I can have fun with you. So never feel that because you don’t look like a Tom of Finland character, or a Love Island cast member you aren’t welcome in my dungeon. All bodies are!
And hopefully, I can help give you a bit of body confidence to take away with you. And this also applies to gender identities. I have cis-male, cis-female, trans-male and trans-female clients. And if you have a particular pronoun you wish to be known by just let me know.
I had one client for whom I was one of the first people he saw and talked to as part of his transition journey, I don’t think anyone else knew at the time. The emotional release and acceptance he had of being referred to as my ‘boy’ was huge for him. It gave him confidence in his own identity – and it was truly an honour to be apart of that.
I guess what I am trying to say, it isn’t about how you look that matters to me. It is about how you feel and how I can make you feel that is most important. But what about experience – why would I want to see someone who hasn’t done anything kinky. That doesn’t matter – I want to help you enjoy your kinks. I love introducing people to the joys of BDSM and fetish!
And if you are experienced but don’t like pain, anal, boot worship, “Yes Sir No Sir” roleplay, or bondage that is fine. If blindfolds freak you out that is not a problem – just let me know. Or maybe you enjoy something like ass play, but worry you can’t take a massive dildo like everyone else on Twitter seems to do now. Don’t worry … we go to your level, your interests and your limits.
Fuck what everyone else says you should do. It isn’t their session – it is yours! So don’t feel any expectation to have to do something you don’t enjoy.
What if you feel your kink or fetish is too “odd” or “unusual” that you can’t tell anyone for fear of being ridiculed?
I am the person you can tell your fantasy to, I am the person who can help you explore it. You will not be judged or criticised – sexuality is an amazing thing! We all have those things that turn us on like nothing else, we can’t explain why we just know they make our dicks twitch.
So come and enjoy them! Our fetishes and fantasies are deeply personal, and there is always a fear of shame when we share them with someone else. I will never shame you, or make you feel that your fantasy is wrong. It is what turns you on, and I want to help you explore that. And most importantly I won’t share anything about it with others! It is between you and me and has nothing to do with the rest of the world.
I have had sessions where we have done some amazingly fun and unique things – some that many definitely thought too freaky to share with anyone else. People who have waited soo long to do something or have it done to them – the moment they get the permission to do it, and know it’s fine is magical! Of course, sometimes we can’t make a fantasy happen.
I can do many things .. but I don’t have WonkaVision for example to make you 10cm tall to indulge in your Land of the Giants fantasy. But! I can help you enjoy that fantasy through roleplay, chat, sex talk or other means.
Having a wank to some porn or erotica is horny, but add someone to talk you through it to make the fantasy together can lead to mind-blowing orgasms!
So, to finish please remember whatever your body or secret sexual fantasy. I can be the person to make it happen for you.
Safe, discreet, confidential!
Don’t just wank over it, make it happen!
Covid … what a fuck up that has been!
The last 15 or so months have been a bit of a nightmare, the pandemic has affected all of us and every aspect of our lives in very different ways. But this isn’t a competition of who has had it worse … we have all had shit to deal with.
And for me, part of that has been not being able to host any sessions. So I’ve had some time off and away from Twitter and the website etc.
I am pleased to say I’ve now been Astra-Zenica jabbed up, and the rules and restrictions we have been living under are slowly easing.
So I wanted to come back here and just do a quick update as I get ready to welcome y’all back into the dungeon.
I am now taking bookings for sessions am pleased to say that many of you have already booked in for which I am really grateful
If you are looking for a session, I have very limited spaces in the next few weeks, but later on and into July there is plenty of availability. I am limiting myself initially to one session a day and all bookings will require a £50 deposit.
And don’t forget if you pay the full amount as deposit you save 10% as a thankyou from me.
To celebrate getting back into the dungeon I have treated myself to some new leathers which will be here shortly, and this beautiful new Muir cap from Spexter in Germany along with these custom wrist cuffs from Bod leather.
So, after over a year of lockdown and frustrations it would be great to see you, and hopefully some new faces too. One thing this past year has taught many of us is that you never know what is around the corner.
And to that end I am here to help fulfil your fantasies, kinks and interests.
Until then … be seeing you.
Some times it just gets all a bit much and I needed a few weeks away from the work world. It was starting to look very bleak and I was wondering if I would ever be able to return to doing what I love. So I had to take a step back from Twitter, Instagram, FetLife, WhatsApp and everywhere else.
But Monday this week so much got better! There is hopefully some light at the end of the tunnel and not some little fuck with a torch coming to tell us it will be another 6 months!
But right now it is important to say everything comes with Covid T&C’s and may be subject to last-minute changes! Please see my Covid page for the latest news and date I will be returning to full-time sessions from.
I will still be taking precautions with sessions when I return – hand sanitiser, temp check on arrival, one session per day etc so spaces will be limited.
And don’t forget for any deposits paid before 1st June 2021 there is a 20% saving to be made. Priority for any appointments will be given to those who pay full-session / deposit before 1st June.
But now I am going to turn my phone back on, respond to everyone I have missed. I really cannot tell you how much I am looking forward to putting some boots and leathers on and welcoming you back for fun and kinky times!
Play safe and stay safe!