Welcome to the Tantric Male blog for Sir Dave!

Check back here for the latest news, appointment availability, new purchases, new ideas and just my thoughts on life work and the world. Oh and maybe the odd photo or collection of photo's I like.

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The Leatherman NYC

1st October 2018

On my recent stop over in New York there was one place I had to visit. No not Big Gay Ice Cream (well not this time – though I do love their Bea Arthur ice-cream), it was Leatherman NYC.

San Francisco has Mr S, New York has Leatherman! Both amazing stores and absolute must visit for any kinkster or perv visiting the city.

Leatherman stock a variety of products from companies like Square Peg, Hanky Toys, Ox Balls, Wesco and Alpha Industries. But they also make a load of their own products, both bondage and clothing! And their leather clothing is amazing, and there is one thing that makes this store so special to visit. Their sizing!

This is something that I have complained about before about so many fetish companies, here you can buy a variety of sizes in their shirts and jeans / breeches. After spending a small fortune at Langlitz Leathers and Wesco (blog post coming in the next few days about that), I wasn’t planning on buying anything here. But that plan didn’t last very long – I’m in a store full of Leather and the smell is quite intoxicating.

I’ve been thinking of buying a new waistcoat / vest for a while, something plain and simple. A thumb through the racks and there are plenty of designs and importantly sizes of vests! And the prices are all super reasonable for the quality of the products.

No sooner had I picked one up to try out one of the excellent staff came over to assist and make sure I was ok and could find what I was looking for. And gave advice and feedback on the products – did they look right, was it the right length and size. They wanted to help me find something that fit! And that is how I ended up walking out with a gorgeous 44″ chest new waistcoat (with several larger sizes and styles available) – I couldn’t wait to wear it, and Flaming Saddles was the perfect place to go that evening in it!

For comparison on the sizing issue that most companies don’t address in Regulation and Mister B for example I couldn’t even squeeze into their largest size of waistcoat in the store.

The store has most clothing upstairs, and down a snug spiral staircase, is the large selection of quality toys and bondage kit! And the workshop where much of their amazing products are made and adjusted.

A great store, great service and well worth a visit!

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Bar Review: Boltz Birmingham

1st May 2018

I’ll admit it, I don’t go out too much to the kink / fetish scene in the UK. Sometimes if you spend too much time on Twitter and Instagram etc you can get the impression you are only a real kinkster if you go out on the scene loads. Nothing could be further from the truth! The gay fetish scene really doesn’t cater for all tastes, and unfortunately like most niche markets is very focused on London (particularly if you are the UK’s largest gay fetish site).

But there are pockets of kink and “man spaces” around the country. And one of those spaces is the long established Boltz Club in Birmingham – my local if you will. The Birmingham fetish scene consists of six main events / spaces:

For the UK’s second city (I can hear the screeches of dissent from Manchester already) this may not seem a lot, but what we have works well for us and satisfies many perverts needs!

Boltz has had a few name changes over the years, and has moved location before but it has been where it is now for a good few years now – just on the edge of Birmingham’s Gay village. The small doorway entrance leads to a dark world to explore!

There are several key areas to Boltz, the bar area, one large central bar with some stools and limited seating options and then all the other areas pretty much lead off from here. There is the outdoor smokers space, heaters, tables and seats there, the ‘educational’ cinema, the cruise maze, the cottages / toilets, sling room, glory holes and of course The Bullring. This is a different take on traditional cruise spaces, it seven different themed spaces / rooms: orgy, dungeon, slave, worship, bike, sling, web. I’ll let you discover for yourselves the different rooms – but if you have every wanted to be fucked on or over a motorbike with horny guys watching this is the place to go!

Boltz hold many events throughout the year, fetish nights, gear nights, sportswear etc all catered for. But one of their most popular is Dare2Bare on the first Sunday of the month (3pm – 8pm). There is a strict underwear / naked dress-code and the place gets full, hot, sweaty and can be a lot of fun!

Bolts isn’t just a fetish / fuck club. It’s just a great bar to hang out with your mates in. I’ve had some great afternoons, evenings there with mates passing the time buy enjoying the vibe, music and drinks on offer. And one of the best things are the great bar tenders they have! I’ve been fortunate enough to travel to the USA a lot and some of my favourite bars are there (the SF Eagle is one of them). And in most American bars you get great bar tenders, they are their to serve drinks, make amazing cocktails, host you and help ensure you have a great time. As one said recently in Key West “if you can’t trust your Bar Tender who can you trust?”

Boltz has been one of the few bars I have been in where the guys working the bar keep an eye out for who is waiting to order, and more impressively they remember what you drink! They notice you’ve finished drinking and ask if you want the same round again. Makes you feel appreciated and welcome!

So if you are in Birmingham and fancy exploring the darker side of its gay scene, Boltz is a great place to go! Or if you just fancy a pint and chat get along, the best thing about Boltz is that you can gear up if you want, you can fuck if you want, you can suck dick if you want, you can wank watching others do that, enjoy a cigar in the smoke area, or you can just sit and enjoy a drink. I will definitely be making more use of this place in the future.

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Review: SM Apartments Berlin

2nd November 2017

I’ve been looking back at an old blog and a few years ago I wrote a post about the SM Apartments, owned by SteelCollar, in Berlin. I thought it was worth sharing a slightly updated version of this post as some of you kinksters may be interested in it.

I’m very lucky in that I have my own permanent dungeon space, but appreciate that most people don’t have that luxury. And so quite often look at hiring somewhere to play, and over the years there have been some amazing play destinations. The Black Tulip in Amsterdam was quite legendary for example!

Around the UK and London there are some dungeons available for the evening or by the hour. But there is something about taking a break away with your boy /slave / maid to an apartment that has everything you need and a fully equipped dungeon & more right there. Oh and one that happens to be round the corner from some very horny bars!

And the SM Apartments are still, in my view, some of the best dungeon spaces you can get!

Berlin is also home to the Hoist Basement apartments – but these don’t appeal as much for me. And there is a very simple reason – the Hoist ones are almost over styled to be hard sex environments. Yeah a good dirty play space is awesome, but I really also like comfort and style to relax in and have my boy clean my leathers and boots in or just sit at my feet as we relax with a good wine. And the SM Apartments offer both the play space, and relaxation and comfort.

This trip we stayed in The Suite, the largest of the three apartments available. This review is based on a visit from 2012, so some of the decor and features and decor have changed since then, but the principles and ideas are the same!

Read More …

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Time for some bum fun … prostate massagers

1st February 2017

I was recently asked if I could recommend some arse play / prostate stimulators. And in the words of the Sally …. yes, yes, yees, yes, YESSSS! And so here are my recommendations for really getting your ass excited and your cock ready for some mind blowing orgasms!

These are presented in price order, getting more expensive as they go on, but all offer something of a buzz! And don’t forget the lube…

 

Rocks Off Raspberry (19.99)

Not sold directly as a “prostate stimulator / massager” this little bundle of joy deserves its place here. Small, perfectly formed and with their own RO-80mm Bullet Vibrator this definitely packs a punch! The vibrator can be removed easily for super easy clean up.

If you want to feel a little something inside your hole that is a bit more exciting then just a butt plug this is a good place to start. But if you are experienced in some anal play, maybe skip down a few places.

 

Rocks Off Rock Quest (£24.99)

Now we get serious … the perfect place for prostate beginners to start. This affordable bundle of joy is small, discrete and perfectly sized. The silicone ring on the outside is comforting to know about … particularly if you get a bit greedy and start to suck it up as you ride it!

The Quest has 10 speed sensations / speed settings that you can go through using the button the base to find the one that really works for you. And this has a really nice bonus … 100% waterproof! This will really help make bathtime one to remember!!

 

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Top to Bottom Leathers

25th October 2016

tbt-gear01Many years ago when I first visited Birmingham Bizarre Bazzar there was a leather straitjacket.

But this wasn’t just some run of the mill straitjacket, this was an item of beauty! The quality of the leather, the finish, the craftsmanship of the design and build was amazing. And that is how I discovered Top To Bottom Leathers, a small British company specialising in bespoke quality leather bondage equipment and products. And they are now one of my two main providers of leather restraints and products.

The company was formed in 2001 and have built a large legion of fans who love their products, they no longer visit many (if any) of the fetish markets / events because their order book is usually full. And if they take on too much work the level of service they provide can only go down through delays in delivery.

All of their own products are made to order, they don’t hold stock items, so if you need a new collar tomorrow these guys won’t be able to help. But if you want a locking collar that fits perfectly you will have reached the right place.

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