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30 Days of Kink: Day 18

6th October 2016

Day 18: Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves? If so, what are they?

Two words … “no limits”.

The amount of times I have seen or read this, people who really don’t understand the difference between fantasy and reality. When going through play negotiation when asked what are they into / would they like the worst answers can also include:

  • Whatever you want to do
  • I don’t mind, I just want to submit and get used / abused

When people say any of the above I ask about a hard caning – one that may leave marks, or how about some needle play, fisting, toilet use? How about sissyfication and putting you in a lovely frilly dress and nappy? How about a branding scene?

All of a sudden “no limits” becomes “not that”.

Clearly their understanding of the phrase and mine are very different.

I understand that a lot of people come to see me as they have a kink interest / desire / need. And if you aren’t experienced let me! Let me explore that interest with you in our discussion. We can work out what aspects of kink and BDSM you are interested in, what gets your eyes to light up and what really doesn’t interest you.

But never give unlimited play … because you can’t withdraw consent. And without the ability to withdraw consent how can you give it? You can’t!

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