Welcome to the Tantric Male blog for Sir Dave!
Check back here for the latest news, appointment availability, new purchases, new ideas and just my thoughts on life work and the world. Oh and maybe the odd photo or collection of photo's I like.
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For a long time I’ve been looking for a kinky fetishy bdsmy club night of pervery that is local.
I will admit I’ve never been a big one for most clubs, the exception to the rule has always been Backstreet. Most gay fetish events don’t interest me because most just seem to be mostly a sex club with crap dress code. If that is your thing that’s fine, for me I want to socialise, be able to have a conversation without lip reading and just nodding and saying “yeah” because I have no idea what you said, and if the mood was to take me … some play! Also respect for basic protocols – collars actually have a lot of meaning!
Now that rant is over, lets get back to the subject. Summer last year I found Kinky Consent on Twitter and something about it appealed. Unfortunately, my diary and the monthly event never matched up and I missed quite a few events. And there have been some amazing sounding nights – the Sissy Pageant sounded a real highlight!
Last year I put the February’s event in my diary as the weekend to loose my KC virginity! I made a note to make sure that I didn’t miss it!!
The night is held at the Klub Kink in Dudley – so super local to me (just 20 mins away). And I must compliment the club for the extensive drinks collection, unfortunately I couldn’t partake in too much as I was driving (I definitely need a slave chauffer next time). The most surprising thing about the venue was the price of the drinks … very reasonable! A Williams Chase G&T was just £4.00! And the most popular thing at the bar seemed to be the Pork Scratchings! And damn tasty they were too.
I was stepping a little outside my comfort zones, going to an event for the first time alone – not knowing anyone who would be there. My social anxiety can go sky high so I find it quite difficult to engage in conversation with people.
In the week I sent Mistress L (one of the organisers) a message to say I’ll be coming along, and received the most enthusiastic welcome and introduction to others in attendance.
The night is usually help over two floors of the club – with a large roomy bar with plenty of seating, a dungeon with variety of kit in it, and upstairs a host of fun spaces! Glory holes, private rooms, orgy room to name a few. And there is also a dungeon area downstairs behind the bar.
The night was a quiet one for attendance, a few regulars and distinguished guests were ill or unable to attend for a variety of reasons. But that didn’t stop the fun! It was a friendly welcoming crowd, not to mention incredibly sexy.
The hosts will make sure you are made to feel welcome, the Mistresses, subs, boys, Masters and others who go provide a great mix of interests and people. If you listen to Secret 102 Radio you will be sure to bump into a host or one of the regular presenters.
KC events also come with some organised fun each month, and this month was the enticing sounding “Last Slave Standing”. Quite simple, a host of impact implements from soft and lovely to very spikey and fuck-me ouchy! The rules where simple … start off with two whacks / strokes with the implement chosen at random by means of a raffle ticket. Then each round it doubled until there was just one slave standing.
The resident Dommes took turns in giving the thrashings, and I was able to enjoy the show sat that the bar with a drink and packet of Pork Scratchings.
I was impressed with all of them!!! I’m sure they were equally proud of their rewards (ie bruises) in the days that followed.
I was also asked to draw the raffle ticket for the prize draw … and genuinely without any cheating or influence I picked my own bloody ticket!! And then because they are such lovely people they let me keep my price – an amazing Crotch Rocket strapon harness and dildo Locked In Lust! The harness and dildo are an amazing combination and have been well used with several slaves since! A full review and pictures will be coming very shortly.
Unfortunately, I have to miss a few more KC nights until I can go again … damn diary conflicts. But I will be back and have made a note in my diary for all the events until the rest of the year so that I can hopefully make this a more regular thing.
So if you are looking for a friendly sociable play night I strongly recommend you get yourself over to Dudley. The next event is April 13th – check out their website for details.
I can’t make April’s, but I’m doing my best to get to May’s 1st Birthday Extravaganza!
This week I visited an amazing new Dungeon that is perfect for those in London and surrounding areas looking to book a BDSM Dungeon session with myself.
This is a private dungeon available for sessions, and is incredibly well equipped! How well? Well to give you an idea it as all the following items:
And of course a huge collection of bondage cuffs, leather and rubber hoods, gas masks etc. And a very extensive collection of whips, floggers and paddles all by Essentia whips.
I also love the padded isolation cage in the corner too – complete with straps inside to make sure you are save and secure for an intense bondage experience!
With all this amazing kit available, including a Venus milker or even a SeriousKit Milking Machine (by special arrangement) you are guaranteed of an intense and unique experience with so much kit t0 choose from.
So instead of fantasising about it, get in touch and book your session!
Sessions are available here with booking, check out the rates page for details!
The dungeon is just 35minutes from Euston if your in London, which is a lot more convenient then spending an hour travelling across the city.
With January now firmly upon us, many start to think about what they want to do in the new year. So this year lets all try to do something new to expand our interests.
This year I plan on doing some new bars, clubs and events, how about you, why not try somewhere new. That could just be a visit to a new city, a new cafe or new bar or even try a very different event.
There is now only one leather bar left in the UK – Backstreet. If you haven’t been then I cant recommend you go enough, it is an amazing friendly sexy and sleazy space! And best of all – they ban phones! If your in a leather bar you should cruise, talk, touch, taste and enjoy as you wish! You should do it in real life not on apps!
For my taste too many clubs now are just fuck clubs with a dress code, and for many events not very well enforced. I want somewhere to play, somewhere that has the space and furniture to put on a show! And so this year I will be visiting Kinky Consent in Dudley. A mixed club night that sounds fantastic fun! Look out for the write up in a few months time …
When we start out on our leather journey of discovery we don’t really know too much. And after a few years we know a little more, maybe we have found a particular interest – rope bondage, single tail whips, humiliation, ass play, objectification or animal role play.
But how do we learn? Most people just make things up and see how it goes, which for a lot of play is fine but for others very dangerous. For example using the wrong type of candles for wax play can lead to very serious burns.
When you start out do you know the importance of aftercare, of the come down for both the Dom and sub? How about knowing how clean some boots properly, look after your leathers or make your rubber super shiney?
Fortunately we usually find others to help us, play partners, Sirs, boys, pups or just friends. And then there is of course a wealth of knowledge in books and other publications that you can refer to and learn from. There are also some online learning resources like FetLife or Kink Academy we can use.
But nothing beats hands on personal coaching, someone showing you how to do something and to help you get better.
So in 2019 why not find someone to help coach you in an aspect of your play you aren’t that confident with. It could be flogging, rope bondage, asserting your dominance or finding your inner pup.
I’m looking forward to booking some private coaching myself this year. What about you?
2018 was a blast, but 2019 is going to be amazing!
Last year we waved goodbye to Tumblr, and this year most people are saying hello to BDSMLR the new home of kink, leather and bondage porn! But one of the best starts to the new year has been my Twitter thread where I asked what was the first TV programme or film that got you interested in kink. There have been some great responses including Darth Vader, Flash Gordon, Rugby games, Terminator to mention a few.
And a few references to one of my early favourite scenes – Bring Out the Gimp in Pulp Fiction. Heart pounding dick throbbing in the cinema!! Another was a film that was on TV, I don’t remember much about it and certainly not the name … but I do clearly remember a guy being handcuffed to a bed and tormented. And then going on the run from his everyday life with the handcuffs locked onto one wrist as a reminder he wasn’t a free man.
Those early memories that sometimes surprise you … a desire or even need to explore and do something you never expected! Going from thinking about it, wanking about the fantasy is something we have all done. But the thought of making that fantasy a reality is something very different and a whole lot more scary.
And that is what I love to do … to help your fantasy become a reality, something you can look back on and enjoy! I had a lovely elderly gentleman visit who told me that he wanted to be able to lie on his deathbed and think back on all the amazing experiences he had enjoyed. Even if he couldn’t share them with anyone, he could enjoy those amazing memories.
This year I will continue to build my dungeon collection, starting in the next few days with new seated suspension to complete my suspension offerings. I’m really looking forward to trying it out – will be perfect to use with the Venus milking machine!
If you are a big fan of really restrictive bondage how would a rubber vac-rac appeal? That is on the list to add in 2019.
I don’t just help start people on their Kink journeys, I also help people out with a Try Before You Buy idea. Do you want to spend over £1,000 on a milking machine never having experienced it … book in for an hour to find out how good it is first!
So whatever your interest, your fantasy, the scene that got you excited to explore perversions and kink I love to hear about them all. And if you would like to try something out then please get in touch!
I’ve been a big fan of the photographic work of Neil Z Page Images, and have had the pleasure of meeting Neil at several events. So when I decided to get a new series of photo’s for the website and social media it was a very shortlist, so short in fact there was only one name on it.
So this month I will be adding new photos the the gallery page and social media. Follow me on Twitter to find out when they are available, but until then here is a preview:
We had a great day getting this series of pictures, I’m really excited to share them with you all and looking forward to booking another session in the new year!